Last night began spookily. The beekeeper, the sexy Best Buy employee, the T-bo, and the tourist were all perfecting their costumes at Annie’s house, anxiously awaiting the stroke of 9 pm so they could arrive promptly on time to the evening’s move. Season 4 of the office played eerily in the background, the house a nippy 62 degrees Fahrenheit. The move was moments from fruition.
Annie, although newly licensed, was not allowed to drive because her parents were worried she would end the night with the blood of a child on her hands and a lifetime worth of regret. Consequently, Annie’s dad drove the collection of friends wearing wildly unrelated costumes to the move a little too early. Maggie’s basement greeted us warmly, DJ Burt’s tunes flowed freely from the speakers, and all was well.
Jack, dressed as the Dalai Lama, was mistaken for Avatar The Last Airbender one too many times. This prompted anger from a man dressed in a costume that embodied ultimate peace. Despite the confusion, Jack was satisfied with the atmosphere of the move, saying, “The music is incredible, DJ Burt Floggin is really killing it.” When Sam was asked for a quote he responded, “Thumbs up emoji.” Later in the evening, Sebi remarked, “Shout out to Aidan S who we stranded on a random lawn by accident.”
Glynnis, trying to be a helpful wingwoman, lifted Annie by the waist, held her tightly against her chest, and force-carried her around the basement two full times in an attempt to get her to talk to a boy who she admires. The encounter ended with intervention by Henry and Annie was returned safely to the ground.
As 12 am neared, the trap music was periodically paused so it could be announced that we had no business staying one second past midnight. As the move-goers grew frantic about the approaching departure deadline, Jane began to lose her bagels. As her collection of bagels decreased from 6 to 3, Jane’s T-bo costume became less convincing. One bagel was hastily yanked from her dowel rod, another she generously donated to a guest who explained how dire her need for a bagel was, and one, Jane ate herself.
The night was ended at McDonald’s. The establishment was the most crowded Annie had ever seen it, filled to capacity with almost entirely MSU students. An angry 45 year old man asked for a full refund on his meal because it was taking too long to get it him, the request rendered Annie speechless.
On the way out of the parking lot, Daisy, in her minivan, almost rear-ended a car occupied by two young people feverishly making out. She was so close to hitting it that the young woman in the car got out, pants-less, and before she could open her mouth to yell, we were absolutely out of there.
All in all, we were glad we could flaunt our incredibly clever costumes to a large group of our peers. Thanks Maggie!
Overall Rating: 7/10
Female to Male Ratio: 6:5
Redeeming Quality: Rachel’s beekeeper costume
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